“I just have to find the right person, and then I can be done with this,” she muttered to herself as she sat in my office, swiping frantically.
Camille was frustrated. She was on all the dating apps, going out every weekend, and constantly messaging, swiping, and looking for the next match– yet, she felt no closer to finding her person.
Like I did Camille, I would like to invite you to consider that perhaps you don’t need to look for love. Camille is one of many clients who is so wrapped up in looking for “the one” that she isn’t really living. She desperately wants to add another person to her experience, but if she’s really honest with herself, there isn’t much of an experience outside of dating, swiping, and messaging the next prospect.
What would it be like to consider that finding love was never meant to be a life-long marathon that ends when you finally walk down the aisle?
What if finding your soul mate or your twin flame is not why you’re here on this planet and living the life that you’re living?
Our generation grew up under the teachings of the Church of Disney, watching beautiful characters like Cindrella, Snow White, and Sleeping Beauty get swept off of their feet and out of their ordinary lives by Prince Charming and just a touch of magic.
And all of those characters have one thing in common- they’re waiting.
They’re waiting for their soul mates. They’re waiting for their lives to begin. They’re waiting to find love and for their day-to-day to be utterly transformed by another person.
No wonder shows like The Bachelor are so popular- It’s a continuation of the same, exact storyline.
Cinderella, after having an amazing, magical night at the ball, goes home and continues to clean and work for her evil stepmother and stepsisters. She doesn’t go out looking for the prince. She doesn’t change anything about her life whatsoever. She waits for him to show up with an empty glass slipper.
It’s positioned so that it looks endearing and magical, but in reality, it’s so powerless and self-sacrificing.
And don’t even get me started on Snow White and Sleeping Beauty- two characters that are literally stuck in a state of permanent sleep until Prince Charming shows up.
This idea that there is one person in the world who is ‘meant’ for us, who is intended to push play on our real, love experience and transform our lives is 100% and absolutely incorrect.
You don’t have to spend another minute looking for your soul mate or your twin flame. In fact, please stop looking for your soul mate or worrying about whether the guy you’re dating is your twin flame.
Instead, consider the idea that your job on this planet as fully and completely and beautifully and magically as possible because you are already connected to all of the love that you’ll ever need – instead of waiting for some magical fairy tale moment, or the next guy to ask you out, or the next blind date, or the next online match.
What if instead of waiting for those things, you were living life and embodying the love and magic that are already yours. And they’re yours because you came from them- you came from love and magic, and you cannot be separated from them.
When we stop worrying about where our soulmate is or who our twin flame is or waiting for the experience we want and instead, start living out the ways that we want to feel, and we start acting in the vibration of the love that we’ve always been connected to, then we start attracting into our experience other people who match that vibration.
Stop waiting for love and start living in the vibration of the love you want to attract.
As an added bonus, this removes so much pressure from your relationships. No person can single-handedly change you life, satisfy you, fulfill you, nor make you happy. No relationship can survive under that pressure.
But when you recognize that you are already fully connected to all of the love in the universe, and you start living out that love, you will start to see the amazing things – and people – you bring into your experience. And you will begin to witness the sheer joy of partnering with another person who is fully living out their own connection to love and amplifying and adding to each other, instead of depending on each other to fulfill an impossible standard.
Trust me, you WANT to be with a person who adds to your already-fulfilling experience. It’s magic.
But the first step is embracing the idea that you are already fulfilled, on your own.
You don’t have to keep putting up with dissection, unhealthy relationships, and bad date after bad date in search of something you already have.
You are connected to an infinite flow of love- it’s where you came from.
Here’s a beautiful mantra for you to remember your true connection:
I am always connected to an infinite source of love. I choose to remember, in every moment and experience, that I am always connected to the love from which I came. I embody divine, perfect love in everything that I do and in every experience that I have. I choose now to open any part of my connection to this love that I may closed down in the past. That was then and this is now. And now, I choose to fully embody love in every way.
I choose to remember that I can never be separated from full and complete love. I am now open to receiving experiences that compliment, multiply, and add to the full and complete love that I already embody. I release any need and any expectation that another person will complete me or fulfill me. I release now any expectation or belief that I am incomplete in any way.
I release now any part of me that has been waiting to be rescued, saved, fulfilled, or satisfied by love that comes from outside of me. Instead, I choose to be pleasantly surprised by love experiences that compliment and multiply the love that I already am. I am complete. I am love. I am loved. I am grateful. Thank you. Together, divine.